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Friday, September 14, 2012

{this moment} In which I'm the new Gabby Douglas, Except for the Sitting on the Couch All Morning Part

{this moment} 

It's actually Thursday morning and I'm going to post this on Friday because I didn't take any pictures this week.  A picture of Gabby Douglas probably deserves some explanation, so  I'll dispense of the "no words" part of the {this moment} rule.  I think we all know I'm not good with "no words" anyway.

Many mornings this week I woke up teetering on the edge of my bed with some amount of distance equal to or less than the width of a balance beam.  Littlest man comes in the bed in the middle of the night and uses all of his little self to squish up next to me and shove me to the edge of my king size bed.  I spend the rest of the night using my Olympian balancing skills to keep from landing on the floor as the crowd gasps and my gold medal dreams shatter.  Plus he sticks his head in the middle of my back and I feel like he's wearing one of those cone shaped party hats, but instead of being made of flimsy cardboard, it's made of metal.  This morning I woke up and husband and littlest man were all the way on my side of the bed.  I peered over to the other side of my bed and there was so much room that a herd of buffalo could've run through there.

So, either I should just be happy that those two guys really love me or I need to take control of my life and kick that kid out of my bed.  But I'm too tired.  I have the whole day ahead of me, but as the lovely and talented Mrs. C. would say, it feels like it's a hundred o'clock.

So, I'm going to just accept my medal, sing the National Anthem, give God all the glory and then take my sponsorship money from Wheaties and go get my own place.

OR I'm going to tell you about watching the Today Show this morning.  It's been a heavy week with all of the 9/11 memories and then the tragic loss of our ambassador in Libya.  I really haven't watched TV much lately, but like I said I'm tired so I just sat myself on my Sanford and Son couch (it's getting really bad . . . I need to make a decision soon.) to check out some of the fluffy Today Show stuff.  We need it sometimes after all the heavy.

If you were doing something really important like raising your children or being a productive member of the American economy, I'll tell you what you need to know.
  1. Ryan Seacrest interviewed Justin Bieber and I think they were competing to see who could gel up his hair the highest.  Justin's hair was taunting Ryan's hair.  Gold medal for you, Justin's hair.  Both men have made equally excellent use of the Crest Whitestrips though.  Stunning teeth.  Stunning.
  2.  Natalie Morales has a new haircut.  Bangs.  She is too adorable for words.
  3. I just saw a  commercial for that movie that is clearly about Scientology, but I'm guessing they'll deny that. Anyway, I caught a glimpse of Landry from Friday Night Lights in the commercial. I'm so proud of him I could bust!  Let's take a moment to remember back when he was just starting out and how Coach Taylor always called him Lance.  Now let's have a moment of silence for Coach Taylor and all of the Dillion Panthers and East Dillion Lions.  I miss them so.
  4. Sarah Ferguson has a new children's book.  Y'all, that girl CANNOT be defeated.
  5. I flipped over to some random channel and Charlie's Angels is on.  There is a reason I always chose to be Kelly when my sister and I played.  She just rolled out of the way of a speeding white van in a parking garage in the nick of time and she did not lose her gun or mess up her wings.
  6. I flipped over to Regis and Kelly, but now Regis is called Michael Strahan and I approve.  He is handsome and funny, but they need to switch sides.  Since when does Kelly sit on the side by the big, spinny wheel?  I don't like it.
  7. There are actually lots of people on TV that don't realize that we should be best friends including Emma Watson, all three of Charlie's Angels, the local weatherman, Michael Strahan and Kelly Ripa's shoes.  By the way, notice this list does not include anyone from The Real Housewives of Miami.
  8. Commercials are SO loud.  Stop doing that, commercial-maker people.  Stop it.
  9. Hoda and Kathie Lee had a list of the top five universities who had "liked" them on Facebook.  The University of Texas at Austin was not on the list.  I'm feeling exceptionally proud of my school this morning.
Now, I'm just getting snarky and smug, though.  There is so much heaviness, people . . . so much sadness, so much pain, so much brokenness in our world.  But sometimes there is some funny, completely irrelevant, ridiculously inane randomness on TV.  I would like to take this opportunity to thank God for that today.  I feel less tired and cranky now.  It's a beautiful day.  If you're still with me, let's get off the computer.  Let's go seize the day or something.  But don't feel bad if you don't feel like seizing.  That random channel I found?  It's got some kind of Charlie's Angels MARATHON going on today.  Joy!  Let's send up one more prayer of thanks for that right quick.

Notice the blessings this weekend, people.

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