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Thursday, January 29, 2015

Vacation Lovin': aka Get Me the Heck Outta Here

Dear Winter,

When I got in the car today to take Drew to school it was so bright and sunny that I needed my sunglasses.  But the thing is that it was only 20 degrees.  So that shiny sun was just a big, fat trick.  That's not even funny, Winter.  Not one bit.  And you keep freaking out all the school officials by threatening giant snowfall and then spitting some sort of pathetic icy rain at us just in time for them to call the whole thing off.  That's not funny either.  Also, Dude. The wind.  Stop that.

Love Intense Dislike,

Y'all I'm totally ready to bust out of here. 

Because of that, I have spent many hours clicking on all the emails I keep getting with subject lines shouting,  "Rock the Resort"  and "Escape in Style" and "We Have Your 2015 Vacation Essentials". Which I find equal parts fun and creepy.  Fun because I am actually going to go on a small vacation soon and creepy because I can't figure out how the internet knows this.  Anyway, I'm going to stop freaking out about how "the man" knows exactly what I'm thinking all the time and just share with you freezing cold friends o' mine some of the vacation items that I'm lovin' for 2015.  Hopefully, you can use some of them in a sunny spot soon.  If not, it's just fun to think about it at least.

The good news is that you can use sunglasses now, even up here in the cold parts of the country, because of those tricks that Winter pulls by letting the sun shine even when it's so cold your eyeballs start to freeze.  I had to break down and buy prescription sunglasses because OLD.  And really, I have to be able to read by the pool or on the beach because otherwise I talk to my husband too much about things like . . .oh, I don't know. . . vacation essentials and the like.  We've been married for twenty years so if I want to keep that streak alive, I need to be sure I have a good book and that I can actually see the words in said book when we are on vacay together so I don't yap too much.  It's one of the secrets to our marriage.

These KATE SPADE FLYNN AVIATORS will keep my marriage from dissolving on our vacation.


I think this is an adorable TOMMY BAHAMA BIKINI  And you know, I love me some stripes.

I also like THIS from Anthropologie.  It comes in blue also..

These might be a need.  because I can wear a bikini only if I am sitting my tush down on a chair.  If I want to walk anywhere - even three steps to get my People magazine that might have blown away in the breeze - I am gonna need to cover up my tush with these.

These by Lemlem are sold at  The are pretty pricey for something that you are supposed to just throw over your wet swimsuit, but the good news is that apparently this company was founded by an Ethiopian model to help struggling weavers in her country.  So you'll feel a little better spending the big bucks on them.  They are so pretty, aren't they??

Now I would hardly consider a new perfume a vacation essential, but don't you just feel like you might need to have a perfume called Beach for a getaway?  Unless, of course, it smells like seagull poop.  I mean, it totally could.  I've no idea what this smells like.  I just like the name and the bottle.

I have to admit that I just went to Old Navy to buy myself a brand spankin' new pair of black rubber flipflops because I CANNOT live without them.  They cost me a whopping $2.93.  THESE FROM SOUTH MOON UNDER are cute also.  They are on sale, but they only have very small sizes available. 

This is definitely an essential because a gal needs her sunscreen and sunglasses and hairbands and chapstick and books and Iphone and magazines and water bottle and diet coke and the rest of the kitchen sink with her at the pool.  I have THIS DOONEY & BOURKE NYLON SHOPPER in black and white stripe. It's a reasonable price and it wipes clean really easily.  I don't see the stripe offered but there are four solid colors available at Nordstrom.

Listen, I'm going to be honest.  I'm not down with the jumpsuit trend.  I just think it's getting awfully close to us thinking that it's okay for grown women to wear overalls again.  I spent the majority of my 30s in overalls which fills me with a great deal of shame and regret.  It's a slippery slope, y'all.  That's all I'm saying.  But maybe you disagree.  It's really none of my business and it appears that the fashion world loves the jumpsuit, so this one might be cute for a night out on  your vacay.  And this gal looks like she's having such fun that she's about to actually jump in her jumpsuit, so there's that.

Well, that's all, I've got for now, friends.  I really hope you find some non-fake sun soon.  I don't mean the kind that shines when it's 30 degrees.  I mean the kind that burns your skin and goes really well with a drink with an umbrella.  But if you aren't able to find that, just bundle up and do some online shopping next to a 100 watt lightbulb.  And you go right ahead and put an umbrella in your coffee.  It might be a mostly cold country, but it's darn sure a free country, for heaven's sake. 

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